This is actually really difficult to talk about since science is the most important to me, but I have received my science test results and I am not proud of them.
I know it’s not the end of the world and I still have a long time before I actually get my GCSE test results back but it was extremely depressing to receive a really bad grade in general for me and to be four grades down from what I really want for science and then for my science teacher to tell the whole class that it’s ok if we are TWO grades away from what we want and all we have to do is just try harder.
I would have been fine if it was a bad grade for RS or Geography or if my Textiles teacher told me that I needed to try harder. However, that’s not what has happened at all. Instead, I am doing better in those subjects than in the one subject I want so badly to be good at. It’s just so frustrating. It feels like no matter how hard I try I won’t be able to do what I want to do and no matter how hard I want it, my job is not going to turn out to what I expected and I know that’s not necessarily a bad thing and that’s probably going to happen anyway but it’s still annoying when I have already set my mind on this job.
I would give up any of my other marks to get a really good one in science. The thing that makes it worse is that I KNEW the answers. We went through the test and they were all understandable things or things that I could easily learn but I haven’t learnt it that much. Partly because last year, my science teacher went on maternity leave and I had a supply and I didn’t really learn that much. Also, it wasn’t even the fact that I hadn’t revised because I had. I tried extremely hard to revise and I still missed the bits that were needed in the test. Even though I went through the whole list I missed all the little details that were needed for those extra marks.
I am really disappointed in my work and honestly, really scared that I will have to change what I want to do when I have already set my mind on science.